Victorian Ventnor on the southern tip of
the Isle of Wight was the stage for the
latest Motley Crew escapade with Timo,
Hunty and JC in the thick of the action.
With south west winds gusting up to 30
knots, steep head-to-logo ramps and a
bone-crunching shore break, the
conditions were what the Motleys
would term ‘On like Donkey Kong!’
Word soon spread that the ‘Crew’
were in town and the island locals,
Scott Gardner, John Metcalfe and
Charlie Connelly were drawn
like magnets to see the Crew in
action firsthand..
We have been calling ourselves the Motley
Crew for the last five years and I though
it was about time that I checked out on
the net what the term actually means, hence the
above definition. So when I hear on the phone that
Timo and Hunty have just missed the 9am ferry I
can’t say that I am that surprised. Let’s set the
scene…it’s one of the best forecasts of the whole
autumn; force 6-7 southwest gales, a pumping
ground swell and wall-to-wall sunshine. I’d phoned
Timo at 7.30am for the call. We were either heading
down to Cornwall to visit Blacky (A trip that involved
eight hours of travel for yours truly) OR Timo and
Hunty were heading over to the Island to come sail
at Ventnor (15 mins from my front door but a five
hour round trip for them!) Guess which option I was
pushing for? After giving half an hour for Timo to
check every web cam west of London to check the
swell situation, I decided to take matters into my own
hands, and drive to Ventnor at 8am for a direct
waterfront report. As soon as I reached the hill
looking down on the beach I knew this was the day
for Ventnor. “George! It’s sick, the tides are perfect,
it’s already blowing 4.5m and the swell is cranking.
Get your lazy arses over here. I’ll get Scott Gardner
on the blower to see if he’s up for it”.
Otherwise known as Gardinaire, (spoken with a hint
of a French accent) Scott is an island local through
and through. He owns the island’s premiere water
sports activity centre ‘Wight water’ and spends
every summer down the beach at Lake every day
supervising the operation. Half brother to Ross and
Arran Williams, Scott is an avid wave sailor and
competent surfer, especially in big and powerful
waves. Always armed with a one liner, his laddish
sense of humour and infectious personality make
him of the great characters to have along on a road
trip or big night out! Needless to say, when I
phoned Scottie was already on his way down about
to go sailing on his own. Another quick call and we
had John Metcalfe and Charlie Connelly to make up
our posse. With Timo and Hunty already en route I
knew this had the makings of an epic day...
one way or another!
MEANWHILE: TIMO AND HUNTY
ARE ON THE ROAD
HUNTY The Ventnor mission started for me at about
6.30 with a call to Mullet. My girlfriend really thinks
I’m completely insane getting up this early to go
sailing but hey, what can you do? We’re addicted!
Cornwall was probably apparently off! Two slices of
toast and numerous phone calls later, the decision
was finally made. We were off to the Isle of Wight!
Hurray! One thing that always annoys me about
going there is that I can see it from my front room as
it’s only four miles away, yet it takes three hours to
get there and apparently is the most expensive piece
of water in Europe per mile to cross! Luckily for us I
used my local contact, Tom Buggy, who managed to
help us out with a cheap ticket from the UKWA and
we were on our way… £36 return with the van. (By
the way Tom, I’ve still not paid you for it, thought it
would be funnier you reading it in the mag before
you remember.)
I had to do a car swap and jump in with Mullet at
Southampton, no easy thing to do as any form of
free parking there was virtually impossible,
especially with only 20 minutes until the ferry and
both us monkeys with out a penny on us! I ended up
just leaving my car in a random industrial estate in a
unit car park! I was expecting it to be towed when I
got back but it was too windy to care!
More phone calls on the ferry and general banter,
the Solent was absolutely howling on the way over
and it took forever, and the drive from Cowes to
Ventnor seemed to take ages, but we finally rocked
up at the beach around midday.
JC was not exaggerating… our first view from the hill
confirmed logo high waves and plenty of wind…
game on! I’ve never personally sailed here but
always remember the old shots of Ross throwing
wild forwards with all the houses in the background.
On closer inspection the swell was really macking.
Niton, which is another 10 miles around the coast,
must have been massive
TIMO MULLEN Being in the Motleys is just like
being in the Army, you have to be on constant red
alert, early morning drills and willing to risk your life
for the code of honour you have signed up to! This
Isle of Wight mission was pure textbook Motley, total
indecision, ferries missed and cars getting wheel
clamped! The one thing the Motleys never fail on
though is wind and waves, and today was no
exception. As always with windsurfing every minute
that you are sat in your car on the way to the beach is
a minute too long…so myself and Hunty rewrote the
Highway Code on the way from Cowes to Ventnor!
THE BOYS ARRIVE... TIME TO RIDE
HUNTY As I stepped out the car Scott “all round
tan” Gardner was just bottom turning on a pitching
logo high bowl. Judging by the way he attacked the
lip, he must have seen us turn up as he fully went for
it smacking it right between the chops as the left
and the right met. Somehow he floated along the
white water more like a surfer than a windsurfer
before gravity finally got the better of him and
sucked him in! He got totally nailed! Fair play, it was
the biggest hit I saw all day!
A rigging frenzy began, I was half way down the
beach with the 4.2 until Timo psyched me out with
the 4.7 pointing out we would need power to get
out. He was probably right but I was stacked out the
back and ridiculously overpowered in the jumps!
With all the water in the bay needing somewhere to
go the rip was horrendous, so any mistakes meant
you would get washed down towards the groyne at
the far end of the beach, and face the walk of doom
back to the upwind side. I would have tried
punching out from the downwind end but Scott
confirmed it was a suicide maneuver when I passed
him trudging back up with all his kit in tatters. When
you could line up the jumping was insane, but
getting the right ramp was really frustrating,
especially when trying to line up JC in the water. The
inside bowl packed a lot of punch and if you got in
the right place at the right time the lip was curling
over just asking to be smacked. I remember looking
at a few end bowls wishing I could 360! I just knew
Swifty would have been banging them out left right
and centre!
Mullet seemed to be struggling. Having hurt his
ankle in Australia he was holding back on the riding
and was obviously gutted. His foot was fine for
jumping however, and I saw him nail a few massive
jumps right in front of JC who really was dicing with
death in the rip. This chirped him up a bit, especially
when he found out we had all seen him nail a bone
dry forty-foot backie! “Scottie, Charlie and John
Metcalfe were all taking the place apart at their
home spot despite pretty treacherous sailing
conditions. Buggy got a few sick turns while I was
walking down the hill from the car park! Proper rail
to rail turns! Must be his new kit!!
TIMO MULLEN It was pumping! Scotty was already
out there nailing some solid smacks on the logo
high waves, I also saw him get severely punished by
one bone crusher of a wave, but inside I knew Scott
would have loved the trashing as he knew we were
all watching from the beach! I have sailed Ventnor a
couple of times before so I knew that this places
was pretty gnarly at this size. Basically the wave is
quite simply the shore break, and a logo high one at
that! I rigged a slightly bigger sail than was really
needed as the rip is so strong here you need it just
to get through the impact zone, plus I wanted to
boost some huge jumps and that extra .5m of sail
cloth might give me that few extra feet in the air. I
was pretty nervous on hitting some of the lips that
day as I had just returned from West Oz that week
where I twisted my foot in Gnarloo, it was still feeling
pretty weak so I was aiming more for rocket air
jumps than the pummelling I might get in the shore
break!
WATERSHOTS
It must have been six years ago when I last shot in
the water at Ventnor. It was a classic session with
Ventnor local Ross Williams where he had just
learned to forward and we managed to get some
really interesting shots of him upside down in front of
the back drop of the very picturesque Ventnor
seafront. Thinking back it was a pretty similar day,
big waves, a hellish rip and sketchy wind on the
inside. It was actually kind of dangerous swimming
out there with so much water pushing you
downwind. Once past the groyne at the end of the
beach there isn’t really anywhere to get back in, so
you have to be on full alert that you don’t drift too far
downwind once out the back. After a pretty hectic
swim out to the back of the waves, I finally managed
to find approximately the right spot to get some
shots (on the way out I kept looking back to see all
the boys in hysterics every time I got
pummelled…That’s mates for you!) I knew it wasn’t
going to be easy lining up because there was a hell of a lot of water moving
around. Despite some steep ramps setting up perfectly for rocket airs, the boys
were having trouble planning on the inside although I was not really sure why.
Out back of the waves it was solid 4.2m weather and the wind was blowing a tad
cross onshore so there was no real explanation why the wind should not be
cranking right into the beach. Maybe the Motleys were just not on it. After fifteen
minutes without a shot I was starting to think this whole palaver was an utter
waste of time. Just before I entered the water, another island local, Tom Buggy
had rocked up and was also in on the action to get some shots while I was out
there. Here’s where the story gets interesting…
At last a set and a gust rocker up in sync all the way to the inside, with Buggy
gunning out from the beach setting himself up for a back loop right in front of the
camera. I lined up for the shot through the lens of the camera totally unaware
that Timo was bearing down from way upwind charging full bore towards the
next ramp in the set. I followed Buggy sailing through the air, until out of the
corner of my eye I finally glimpsed Timo who was already on his way from what
must have been a huge back loop. As he floated down towards a textbook
landing Timo glanced over his shoulder to make sure I was snapping the money
shot. At that precise moment he realised that I had just been shooting Tom
Buggy and missed his move completely… a look of horror crept across his face.
To be honest I had not seen him coming at all but I knew Mullet would never
forgive me for missing the shot. The next thing I hear is Mullet yelling “Carter I
was 40 foot up” his face in a state of shock, disbelief and dare I say it… hatred!
I decided to keep my mouth shut and hope that sometime soon he would pull off
another decent stunt. If not I would never live this one down… the pressure was
on! With jumps hard to come by I was praying for at least one more decent ramp
to keep Timo from completely spitting the dummy. Each time he came past he
just looked in my direction, shaking his head in complete disgust. Missing the
shot of a big Motley stunt is unforgivable but to have been shooting another
sailor while it’s happening can only be considered sacrilege.
After a tense half hour where I knew a possible break
up of the Motleys was on the cards, the wind fully
kicked in, and at last the boys could start busting out
some stunts. Timo nailed a couple of big backies
right in front of the camera and suddenly I became
his best mate again…funny that! Hunty and
‘Gardinaire’ both pulled some decent stunts right in
front of the Ventnor back drop right before a dark
cloud finally meant the end of our window signalling
time for me to swim back through the death shore
dump. While I was out there, I had completely
forgotten about the rip or any dangers from the sea. I
think I would have rather drowned than upset Mullen!
TIMO MULLEN Any windsurfer in the world, pro or
otherwise, LOVES getting their photo taken, and I am no
exception to this rule! Now any one who has worked
with JC will tell you what a good photographer he is and
he rarely misses any big moves, but for some reason he
does have an uncanny knack of always missing my best
move of the day! I remember it was really hard to line up
with JC in the water; he was being constantly swept
away by the current so to hit the perfect ramp and have
JC just below you was really hard. Then I saw an insane
ramp, I was well powered up, it was wall to wall
sunshine, I hit the logo-high ramp at full speed, soaring
into the air into one of the highest back loops I have ever
landed, on the way down as I looked over my shoulder I
could see JC in the water with the camera pointed the
other way! What? I’ll kill him! How dare he even
consider taking a photo of anyone else, this is my party!
Just kidding, but I have to admit I was gutted. JC could
not even look me in the eye; he knew he was in trouble!
Fortunately the wind and waves improved considerably
so JC was able to redeem himself and snapped
some pretty awesome shots!
APRES SAIL:
LAGERS IN THE SPYGLASS
JC: LAST BLAST For some reason I felt guilty that
the boys had splashed out and come all the way
over for the day, so I offered to buy them dinner at
the Spyglass (An amazing pub right on the water at
the far end of the beach). Later that evening, I
realised what a blunder I had made. After all, they
had just scored an epic day on the water, while I had
either been stuck on the beach or risking life and
limb out in the water to take their photos. They had
laughed at me getting pummelled in the shore dump
and the Buggy incident was not really my fault. As I
am writing this, I find out they never even paid for
the bloody ferry! Now that is what I call Motley!
HUNTY The beer and the burger were well needed
as I’d only had two slices of toast and Timo a bowl
of cereal all day. JC had to leave the pub pretty
quick muttering something about the wife,
babysitting and aerobics.
After a race down all the back roads following
Charlie and John trying to make an earlier ferry,
(obviously this being a Motley trip) we missed it by
about 30 seconds! That meant another hour sitting
around. But at least when we made it back to
Southampton my car was still there. It was locked in
but I bumped it over the curb and was home free!
Day trip over… job done!
TIMO MULLEN Poor JC was feeling guilty, so much
so he treated myself and Hunty to a slap-up meal in
the local pub. It was quite a special day as myself,
Hunty, John, Charlie, Scott and JC would probably
not see each other for the rest of the winter so it
turned into a bit of a Last Supper. Classic tales of the
day were recounted with unofficial awards for best
wave going to Scott for his opening wave when we
first rocked up. In fact, everyone was sailing well that
day; John’s massive forwards, Charlie’s back loops,
Hunty’s tweaked aerials and Buggy’s sick gouges.
As with any typical Motley day it ended in disaster as
Hunty and myself missed the ferry by 30 seconds -
pure comedy!
